Most people who try online dating FAIL miserably as they have no idea how to calibrate the next step.
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When it comes to asking for a date with online dating, it is no different to the real world. You have to know the steps to know exactly how to get the person you like to go on a date with you. |
You have to seize the moment or the chance may never occur again.
Experience has taught me, that waiting weeks or months won't get you anywhere.
Trust me, you do not what ANOTHER pen pal.
A false sense of security builds and chances are you'll become good friends or cyber buddies. That's fine if you're looking for a distraction or a mate, however, if you want to go the next step, timing is everything.
How many times I've tried the nice guy approach, flirted, joked, complimented etc, only to find that a week later, she's gone cold, not replying, not online or worse still, spoken for!
So BIN the idea of starting off as JUST FRIENDS. Because she will instantly put you there and it will be very difficult if not impossible to get out of it ( especially in the online world)
The key ingredient is SEXUAL TENSION.
Flirt when ever possible.
Playful banter is always a bonus, if they take it the wrong way then they obviously do not have much of a sense of humour. OR it may have come across and interpreted the wrong way in text chat which is easily possible.
Be confident and assertive, without coming across as arrogant.
So once the sexual chemistry is high and there is a lot of playful banter , that’s when you ( especially guys) need to take the next step.
Which is - the PHONE!
Asking someone straight away on a date can easily scare them off even if you built the trust, comfort and sexual chemistry.
Building more trust can only do you good aslong as it comes with humour and sexual tenstion.
A simple thing I say to women online to get them on the phone is:
‘ Hey lets talk on the phone like two normal people and see where it goes from there’.
Credit to David De angelo - Meeting women online (read my review)
Must strike a balance from progressing from one step to the next to having more and more fun, creating chemistry and sexual tension.
From there?
Well its pretty simple, do what you normally do when your flirting with someone you like on the phone.
Do and act pretty much how you were when you first chatted online and then when enough comfort and trust is built.
Suggest a place to meet. My favourite technique is to figure out what the woman I am chatting to do would like to do and then say ‘ Hey lets go out and do that sometime this week, it will fun!’. Works like a charm ;)
So just remember, If you don't act fast, chances are, you will be forgotten as quickly as you first introduced yourself.
So in concluding, it's all about finding the balance between building comfort and trust and humour with a sprinkly of sexual tenstion. Then using this principle with every step you take, form your first email, your online conversation to the phone and to the date. which is the perfect time to ask for that date. Wait too long at your own peril.
Sean King
Author @Datinghut.com
I have been writing for dating hut for a few years now. Helping give unbiased reviews so people can succeed in online dating!
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